AND THE WINNER IS...

ANNA!!! In the battle against diabetes and the possible side effects of oral medications, I emerged as the winner for this month's set of laboratory tests.

Test results reveal that I have normal blood glucose level and that my liver is also in good condition. As always, I get so nervous claiming the lab results but upon seeing the expression on the face of the med tech, I knew the numbers were good. I didn't expect it to be this good though!

I know that the battle is still far from over but at least emerging victorious in several rounds constantly inspires me to do better and stick to my diet plan. I have to strictly follow doctor's orders for me to get better. I understand when I was told that there is no cure for diabetes and that once diagnosed as such, you are forever a diabetic; there is no other thing for me to do, I just have to control the disease. It takes so much will power. Resisting temptations is not easy it is rather very HARD but I have to will my mind to do so for the sake of my children and the people who in one way or the other have looked up to me as mentor and source of wisdom and strength.

The biggest victory for me however is my weight loss! I am now down to 92.5 kilograms. I know I still have to work out more to lose more. I am  just very happy that though it is a slow decline, it is still inspiring.

Again, thank you to all of those who constantly commend and acknowledge the weight loss. All of you have helped me want to do more...

Cagbalete Island

Our family went to Cagbalete Island in Quezon last April 1-3. It was such a beautiful place that really provided time to relax and just enjoy nature at its best. We stayed at Villa Cleofas and we enjoyed the fact that we had to go through some new and exciting experiences just to get there. It was a really enjoyable vacation for the family.

When we arrived at Mauban Port we thought it was going to be an easy boat ride. Little did we know that because it was a private boat and would take us directly in front of the resort, we went against the tide and so we already experienced the saltwater early on. Getting nearer the island, we realized that it was already low tide hence we had to transfer to a smaller boat to be transported nearer to shore, when the small boat got to us, the waves were acting up so it was an extreme act of balance to transfer! Still, we had to do some trekking to get to the shore.

Our cottage was airy. We were comfortable while waiting for the tide to get back in so that we could have a dip. The first night was very quiet and relaxing. Although electricity was cut off by 1a.m., it was alright because it was really cold the whole night.

Early the next morning, it was high tide and we immediately went in. The water was refreshing! It was amazing how even though we were so far from the beach, the water did not become very deep making it easy for all of us to just enjoy swimming.

When it was again low tide, we decided to walk to the Bonsai Island and see the sights. Before that, we prayed the rosary and then took some pictures. It was really beautiful! 

The third day marked our journey back home. My son described the experience as death-defying as we had to walk all the way back to the edge of the Bonsai Island to get to our private boat. Before getting to the private boat though, we had to hop onto the small boat again and cross to the bigger boat very carefully to avoid falling into the very deep water as it was beyond the Bonsai Island already. At the port, we could not find a "parking" slot for our boat that is near enough to the stairs so once again, we had to do something "exciting" to climb--rock climbing! It was scary yet fun!

All in all, it was quite an experience for all of us. We enjoyed simply being together and spending some quiet time with the family. As early as now, we are already planning on returning to the island.

Beating the Boys...

Had a great hour of playing badminton today with my boys. I don't know if they were just making me win but I actually beat both of them in several games! I noticed I was able to move more around the court and make good shots that they could not hit back. I guess the constant walks have helped me a lot. I had fun and surprisingly, I did not feel nauseous this time.

That was my work out this morning...Had to do more though. I also did brisk walking for 45 minuted this evening. I enjoyed that too! 

I am not trying to push myself too much but I just want to find out if I have already built my resistance enough to endure these activities. Getting myself ready for phase III...Getting back in shape and getting better. :)

 

 

Thinking things through

There are days when you just want to know if you still like what is happening to your life--sort of assessing if there are other options. Could there be a better source of personal fulfillment? You start to doubt the status quo. Today is one of those days. 

It was a weird sort of feeling towards the middle of the morning when I started to feel lonesome. Then I wondered, "Was there something else that I wanted to do in my life?" Funny how despite the fact that there are so many positive feedback there is still a feeling that somehow something is amiss. Could I be doing more?

I am looking forward to some quiet time to think things through. Sort out all the cobwebs lurking in my head and finally make a decision that would not only benefit my family and friends but my heart as well. I have to find the place that would make me happy and content.

Then again I wonder, could I start over again? It's hard to take the first step out especially when there are some people you care that will get left behind. Is it enough though?

Wish there was an easy solution to all of these. A lot of serious thinking must really be made. Hmmmm....

Good Readings

Just wanted to shout out that today has been a remarkable day for my quest to battle diabetes. AM blood glucose reading was 110 and PM blood glucose reading was 92. Both are within normal range! 

All the discipline and hard work has paid off. It makes me want to get better results! It inspires me to make healthier adjustments to my lifestyle and choice of food. Now that I know it can actually be done, I just want to do more to get better. People are starting to compliment the evident weight loss. I want to see more changes in me.

Anyone up for a game of badminton? :)

Teacher Anna's Lessons for the Day

Spinning off from Alex Lacson's book, entitled: 12 Little Things Every Filipino Can Do to Help Our Country, I asked my students to make an essay on two little things they can do as Lyceans to help our country. I had them present a summary of what they wrote in front of class and the things that they suggested they could do to help our country surprised me. 

The one dominant suggestion was to follow simple rules and regulations and become disciplined citizens. It hit me! That was exactly what this country needed—for its citizens to start following rules and abide by regulations of the different institutions they are connected with—if everyone would do that, we will definitely have a peaceful, corrupt-free, harmonious Philippines. If only all government officials become role models for its citizenry by using the Constitution to good and constantly referring to it in making decisions, then probably our country wouldn't be in the state it is in. I then remembered the movie Bata, Bata Pano Ka Ginawa. One line that hit me was from Vilma Santos' character, Lea Bustamente, to adopt from its Filipino version, she said: "It is easy to explain how a child is created. What is hard to explain is how to mold every child into a decent individual. If every child grew up to become a decent citizen, then we would have created a decent society that we could be proud of bestowing to the future generation." True. We have to strive to teach decency to our children so that they will be able to govern a decent society. The most simple way to do this is to follow rules and regulations and striving hard to become disciplined. We may never achieve this perfectly but we can at least try by making sure that rules are set and implemented. We may slide from the norm for reasons beyond our control but we could always make things right again as best we could to go back to its status quo.

Another suggestion that my students gave was to pray—pray for our country so that it can survive the challenges ahead, pray for the candidates of the coming election so that they would learn to accept the results of democracy, and pray for the registered voters to make decisions dictated by their hearts and conscience. For if humans are weak, divine intervention would always be the best option. 

Today, I learned valuable lessons from my students. It was a humbling experience but at the same time, I am proud to have had the opportunity to touch the lives of these students who give me hope that with them around, the future of this country may have some light after all...

NORMAL

Since my hospitalization, my blood glucose readings have been constantly fluctuating ranging from 113-175. There was even a point when I started to really get worried because despite religiously taking my medications and watching what I eat, my numbers would still not get down to normal readings. 

I may have had good days but I only get one good reading a day and that good one still never hits normal. I test myself twice in a day. The morning readings are the high one and the afternoons are the promising ones. According to my doctor, the normal reading should be 70-110. This was my constant goal on a daily basis. 

Today, I had a good start, getting a reading of 115 in the morning. Then I did the usual, walking, some stretches with the help of my gadgets and my favorite 30-minute steam sauna routine. After the two-hour fast before testing, I was in hurry to finish the test for I was growing so hungry. Then, there it was, 100! Finally, 19 days into the dieting, exercising, drinking lots of medicines and choosing healthy food, I got a normal reading. One hundred! Today is essentially a normal blood glucose day for me and for the first time, my fears have been alleviated. It can be done, it's no longer a lost cause. Normal. So, this is how it feels! I am proud, relieved to know that it can actually be done. I rewarded myself of course, I meal of grilled fish and sinigang with the normal one cup of rice, no extras. Now that I know how it feels, now that I know I can do it, I want to keep it up...

The Lift

Remembering old times. Looking back, I would have never traded all these for anything. On that note, I think I could say that I'd probably be easier to lift now. :)

Looking forward to shaping more lives and making the difference for tomorrow's leaders. Summer workshop, here we go!!!

Eighteen Days After

Rewards

Having been recently diagnosed as a diabetic did not come as a shock knowing how I did not really watch my diet and I had such a crazy lifestyle all these years. Still, it is very overwhelming and the sudden changes to my diet have been very hard and at the same very tedious on my part. It is also hard for the people surrounding me because they all have to somehow also 'sacrifice' not enjoying what they used to so that I wouldn't feel left out. Immediately after my diagnosis, my family had to get rid of all the chocolates and sweets at home because they did not want me feeling sad whenever they would eat them and it was one of the things that I had to avoid even having small portions of. My doctor specifically told me to avoid pork, beef, sweets, pasta and all of the other stuff I was used to eating all the time.

I knew it was going to be hard and I knew that a lot of changes will be happening to my lifestyle. I followed my doctor religiously. It gets frustrating when I know I have followed all the rules and have avoided all of the food that I really love and the darned glucometer still comes up with high results. I just don't understand how I could get normal numbers. Everything is still fluctuating as if I am doing nothing and not taking my medications on time. I have been sticking to white meat and water and not eating even when I feel a little bit hungry to the point that sometimes I think I am already being deprived. I am doing everything to try to remedy my condition.

The only upside to all of these sacrifices is the fact that I am beginning to lose weight and a lot of people have commented that I am truly starting to get slimmer. This makes me look forward to having a better physique and wearing the clothes that I have longed to use. Another reward is the opportunity to do more activities with a better physique. 

Thank you to everyone who have been backing me up and to those the have been genuinely encouraging to my quest for a healthier body! All of you are the real rewards I am receiving despite all of the things that have happened. Knowing that I have family and real friends I could depend on make me stronger and have better resolve to make myself better to live longer, spend more time with all of you and allow myself to love all of you more!

Changes

A lot of people have told me that things happen for a reason. I am now beginning to believe them. Everything that I am going through now is the direct effect of how I have treated my body. From the work that I have been doing up to the food and beverages I have been consuming. Two weeks ago, I had a wake up call as my body has had enough and just gave in.

I was hospitalized for four days and the diagnosis--diabetes mellitus type II and hypertension! At the age of 35, my doctor says this is alarming and no laughing matter at all. I have to start watching what I eat, listen more carefully to what my body tells me, and be mindful of stress signals that means slow down, breathe! Chill.

Changes. There are so many adjustments to this condition. Less carbohydrates. No more sweets! No pork and no beef. No more sweets! No more alcoholic beverages. No more sweets! Less intake during meals. No more sweets! Aarrrgghh!

On the bright side, this could mean better weight. Better physique and more choice of clothes to wear. But, no more sweets??? Italian? No can do! Aarrrgghh!

Who am I to complain? I was the one who abused my body and devoured all the food that I could at all times. Now, I have to face the consequences and become disciplined enough not to give in to temptation and look forward to the positive changes that have yet to come.

Yes! Things happen for a reason. Be healthy, live longer, love life. I am going through a lot of changes and I am looking forward to the positive outcomes of all the adjustments. With the support of my family and friends, I know I could get through this.

All In A Day's Work...

2010: New Opportunities

2010 has arrived! Many say that this is the year that would make a multitude of changes for a lot of people. I am hopeful for these changes and I am praying that they would all be for the best! A lot of things will be happening--elections, automation, new government--and we are all waiting for positive to happen for the country and our personal lives.

Amidst all these things, I am sure of one thing, we have to start making changes in ourselves if we want to see and experience the changes. As the lyrics to of of the many hits of the late MJ says: "I'm starting with the man on the mirror. I'm asking him to change his ways. No message could've been any clearer. If you want to make the world a better place, take a look at yourself and make that change!" We have to do this. Probably, we'll have to stop asking the rest of the world to change and adjust to our needs and instead start making the changes ourselves. Nothing will happen if we all just complain and not willing to make the first move to make things better. We can't keep on pinning our hopes on other people. We'll have to make the moves to make this country a better place and in time making the world perfect.

Let's start with our homes and then moving on to our communities. Places of work and other endeavors that would give us the chance to lend our helping hands to be able to affect change in others in a positive light. Let us work with our hearts and sure enough, things will become brighter and better.

Here's to looking forward to a year of hope, health, and a lot of happiness!!!

Happy New Year!

Teacher Anna

It is truly a noble job because it entails June 2009 marks one year of my being an educator. Wow! Deep huh? The feeling is great, tiring yes but still it is a great fulfillment for me. I love being able to affect change and helping people evolve into better individuals because i was able to impart something significant into their systems.patience, diligence and responsibility. I hope to keep counting more years into this endeavor.

Limbo

They say that going through the state of LIMBO is confusing. Sure as hell it is! Coupled with all the pain and shock I am going through now, it truly feels like LIMBO already.

I never thought I would be going through this again. Never thought I will so lonely once again. I am lonely. I am sad. I am miserable. I am in LIMBO.

Why? How could I have been so stupid to let this happen to me again? What was I thinking? Who the hell did I think was I? Shcmuck.

You should have seen all of this coming. This was doomed from the beginning. Too many people not wanting it to work. They've finally got their deepest wishes.

I should have not let my heart into it too much. Trying to love all those people that mattered to the one I cherrished. These people who do not have the capacity to try to let you in easily. Making sure everything get hard and harder for you to blend. Making you feel like a misfit from the start to the end. Yes, finally, it is the end. For my heart has stopped feeling just to protect it from the PAIN.

But it lingers...still PAINFUL...in LIMBO.

Heaven Sent Me An Angel

Heaven sent me and Angel over a year ago. We call him Kirby. A lot of blessings has come our way since we welcomed him into our lives. Right now, our daily routine is to always play with him in the morning and most especially from work. This gives us renewed strength after each working day.

It has been said that helping others always finds ways of becoming rewarding. I certainly believe that now.

The Great Move

I made a very big step in my life recently. We moved. Simple as that but complicated in all essence especially to me. I have always been around family and it was not very easy to finally decide to be on my own. But it is a relief especially since we can now freely move around our own space and we can make decisions on our own on how to run our lives. Take vacations as long as we want and our respective works would permit, prepare as much food as our stomachs could handle, drink to our heart's desire, the works! Of course, it comes with a lot of obligations and responsibilities. A very wise man once told me that every privilege is coupled with obligations. Good enough that I have been facing my responsibilities for some years now. I am confident that I could tackle a little bit more.

New home. New beginnings. New hope.

Memories.

The most memorable experiences of my life happened in the "Christmas house," as my close friends fondly call it. Why? Take a look at its color and you'll know why. It is on the long stretch of Scout Rallos Street adjacent to the famous Timog Avenue. I spent 90% of my present lifetime there! Looking back, I think that I made special memories in all the corners of that place. There were so many hiding places that I could recall where I would run to whenever my Lola chases me with a broomstick to whack my buttock because of a mischief I have done.

All my birthday parties were held there! I remember I had one every year. Come to think of it, I do not remember now who initiated them when I was still young. Who prepared the food, et cetera. Of course when I was already of age, I already had a hand in the preparations and the choice of food and the events that would take place on every party I had. But whatever we had for the party, I always remember that all the parties I had during my birthdays at the "Christmas house" was always a blast! Filled with so much fun memories, others hilarious even!

Everything happened there, everything! Nights of sneaking in, mornings of sneaking out! Ha! ha! Bringing in booze to my room with my friends, taking a puff or two of cigarettes! Studying until the wee hours of morning. Partying until the wee hours of morning! There! Talking to the phone for hours until everything hurts so bad - the ears, the shoulders, the buttocks - or until you get caught! "Friends" coming over every now and then. Receiving them in the lanai and even sometimes chatting with them at the gate!

All the important events of my life was witnessed by the "Christmas house." From childhood to motherhood! Only the "Christmas house" bears witness to all the secrets, tears and laughter I went through all these years. All my failures, aches and pains. All my triumphs, successes and glories. All these will forever be held captive by the "Christmas house." All of them it will keep, until it stands to its last days.

It is indeed to let go of a place which has been "home" for you all your life. No matter how "dysfunctional" I have perceived my family to be, the "Christmas house" still held the special title of being our "home" for so long. During my youth, I was always intrigued at how a family would look together in a dining table, yes, I never had that but I had a place to come home to no matter what. No matter what happened to my life, I would always go back to the "Christmas house" because that is where my "dysfunctional" family is....and that is "home!" Daddy Remy, thank you for letting us have this, we will be eternally grateful for everything!

It is a good thing that all of the memories are all locked in my heart. Photographs and video clips would fade and rot but in my mind and my heart, the place will never fade. Even if the "Christmas house" will soon cease to exist, I will always have the memories with me. And I shall never forget...

TRAPPED!

florita...

what have you done for me lately?

florita...

because you are here, i cannot seem to go anywhere.

there! you have kept me trapped.

where?

in the office!

that's true! i haven't gone home since tuesday and it seems i will be staying here until saturday. heck! while i am at it, better make the most out of it. work on the back logs and shop! blame it on the rain! had no plans, mind you! just sorta had to...

Milestones

April 8, 2006 was a remarkable day for my first born! It was an emotional day for me as well, was teary-eyed the whole time my little boy was being transformed into a man. There was a sense of pride and anxiety as I was still unsure of what would happen to my son's future. But one thing is sure though, he'll always have me by his side no matter what...and that he'll always be my baby boy!!!